quirks are us


Nature vs nuture…yikes, this is a BIG topic to tackle this week GBE2 people. I started to formulate a thought, and then completely rationalized it away- blown off to the dusty recesses of my brain. Started thinking of it from the opposite angle and ..whoosh….gone …

So, instead of trying to figure out a direction for this post, I will instead just start typing and see where all the letters fall when I am done,
(which- to be perfectly honest- is how I always write these updates, but in light of that BIG topic, I sort of got ~skeered~  into considering a more thoughtful approach, um didn’t work)
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This is a sketch of my two youngest sisters 
 the younger one, on the bottom in the sketch, is the artist
she has a remarkable talent
this little scribble is nothing compared to her ‘real work’ but even this scribble perfectly captures those two at their finest -ha, just kidding girls.

I share this because I did not really grow up with my sister the artist. She was born when I had been out of the house for a few years, in fact, she is only just now in college. Same parents, same house, same school system…different decades – not one, but two decades apart.

Strangely enough,  her sense humor – her odd habit of clapping – and other little quirks show striking similarities to my own weirdness. I could say it is because we had the same mother, same genes…. and I guess I will give that a shot for the sake of this post. But it still seems incredible.  The other sister above, only shared the same roof for about five short years…. and yet…hmmm…same with the sister directly under me in the really- stretched-out paper chain of girls…hmmm,  is all I can say. We are alike, we are different…it is understandable and perplexing at the same time.

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There is a lot to be said for nature, meaning “the genes made me do it“, and just as much for nuture…”it’s how I was raised”  but what I find the most fascinating, and, why I suppose I lean towards nature, originates from the fact that I have three younger sisters, four kids of my own, foster girls and have had the privilege to know many other kids over the years through friends and teaching…

All this informal research adds up to one tiny truth -that little three year old, whether they are bossy, shy, energetic, silly or a smarty pants to the third power, has personality traits that will stick throughout their life. Running into kids I have not seen in many years, as well as looking back on old video tapes of my own kids, proves this time and time again.

This little water loving boy has joined the Coast Guard…it makes perfect sense.
I have always imagined him growing up to be in law enforcement, or fire fighting …
something where law and order ruled – where he could be in authority – while keeping everyone safe. 

   
That’s what he did back in our first apartment complex, littlest one of the neighborhood boys,

and yet – everyone listened. This is his skill set; leadership and safety.

He was the safest, most self-assured little man around, safer and more assured than his mama that’s for sure. He wanted a daily schedule posted on the fridge each and every day. It did not matter if I slipped chores in the mix, if the schedule said we fold laundry from 4 pm to 5 pm, well then so be it – that was what had to happen. (and in other words, if, it was not on the schedule, sorry lady, you missed your chance)

His skill set was the given, his love of water – possibly also a nature trait…I love the water, but throw in the twist that his grandma is afraid of the water and this well-ordered nature-nuture machine starts to fall off the track.

no matter, raising the kids you have with all the loving nuturing ability you can muster is important, because

….Ready or not, they will grow up….

and move on
not a sad thing, what a privilege to have had the chance to be a part of their life 
– and besides, moving out is not the end… cuz, I know I still need my mommy. 
*one last thought, I strongly believe people can change- but even with change, the core stays the same…if that wasn’t true, the hoardes of mindless blank slates would be frightening. 
Besides, I like quirky people, nothing better than a true individual. 


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7 thoughts on “quirks are us

  1. Interesting take on the challenge. I could have never predicted what my age peers would become in later life. The kid that used to poke fun at me grew up to be some PhD psychologist who helps folks in need. Didn't see THAT one coming.Joycehttp://joycelansky.blogspot.com/2011/11/gbe2-nature-vs-nurture.html

  2. Jo- ch-ch-ch changing all the time, but I am still *me* Joyce- people surprise us, but I still say the kid underneath the big job is the same- thankfully with a better focus in life than before…Linda- PlUS, how simple- that's it, not OR, Plus – thanks!

  3. This is wonderful and I love it!! As Jo said, you can change what you do, where you live, but you can't change your core or who you are!Kathyhttp://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com/

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